woodenspoon's Datingish

my boyfriend's new born baby

Mon, 27 Jul 2009 01:00:43 GMT

My boyfriend is one of the most amazing people I have ever met. It's Funny how you go through a tough break up & you think you will never find anything then all of a sudden someone comes into your life- out of nowhere. That's how it was with me & my love.

Here is the thing--- His ex girlfriend of about a year & a half just had his baby. When he told me I was terribly hurt & so was he. We cried in each others arms & he told me how much he loved me, that he was sorry, he didn't want to loose me, that I was so different...

I thought "Why couldn't it be me?". A baby is a special part of someones life & all he wants is to be the best dad he could be & I am so proud of him. He is so responsible & just wants his daughter to experience a happy life.

But then again there is me. I want to be happy too. He makes me feel like I am on top of the world but now that the baby is here I know everything will be different. I know I will be part of the baby's life & I have no problem with that. I would enjoy playing, changing, having walks or just watching the baby with him. I am just scared that he will all of a sudden want to rekindle things with his ex or vise versa. He says that his first reaction when she had told him was trying to make it wok for the baby. I questioned that to him--- "If you didn't have feelings for her then why would you suggest that?" He told me that he never pictured his life like this. That everything is backwards & he thought that doing that would make things better for the baby even though that would mean sacraficing his happiness since him & the baby's mom do not get along.

He tells me he knows things will be okay & yes it will take some time for everything to come into place but to please be patient with him.

I see potential in our relashionship & do see it blossoming I am just afraid & would just like to know if anyone has or knows someone who has been in a situtaion like this. What was the outcome?

S U P E R B

Fri, 22 May 2009 16:03:41 GMT

I can't even tell you how happy I am right now. Sooooo--- I saw the ex boyfriend at Topppers & I didn't feel much. It was nice.

I got my sewing machine tattoo also---Loves it =]

this is the diary of ann frank--- okay not really it's just me. Blue Angel you ready?

Fri, 08 May 2009 16:33:47 GMT

It all began---

To make things short of how things started- Basically we went to middleschool together never talked then I saw him summer entering highschool & thought "CUTIE!" then about 2 years later I begin to communicate with his friends & then BAM! me & him--------

I knew from the very begining that he would be the one to make my heart glow. Everything was amazing. HONEYMOON STAGE! 1 year & 6 months. We never met anyone like eahcother. Shared the same pasiions, could laugh about the same jokes--- everything. He was MY everything.

Then about 5 months later is when we began to fight about the little things. I used to play games with him blahh blahh. Okay fine. We broke up & I was hurt. That didnt stop us though--- we couldnt help it. So we still saw eachother. Everyone knew us as boyfriend & girlfriend. We just didnt have the title [ I mean we pretty much were---we dated no one & just acted the same when we were together]. I think we were just scared. I was. I didnt want to feel the break up again.

Another almost year passed--- I started to go out & even met new guys. I guess you could say I was begining to neglect my ex. We got in a arguement in November of 2008 when he said "Colleen! Be my girlfriend" when I replied with...

"I cant--- not right now" I guess I didnt feel like he meant it. & this was over the phone so I wanted it to be more real.

He took that answer & stuck with it. Then about 1 week & 5 days later I look at his myspace [yea i know damn myspace] & there it was-----in a relashionship.

He had met a girl on myspace 2 years younger then us, still in high school & was now dating her.

I wanted to die.

Of course I said " Just be with me" & he said "Nope, I cant"

I reached out to EVERYONE. I couldnt breath sometimes I swear. Everything gone. I felt like why I should go on... He was my first [you got it] & vice versa--- he was my love. We almost even had a baby together [which lead to a miscarriage]

Anyhoo--- I was so desperate to be like " Who does this girl think she is?" So one pf my friends added her so I could look on her page & I found comments by my ex to her that made me feel icky. There song is even by the same band as mine & his. He became depressed [his friends told me] & all he wanted to do was drink. He even saw me a couple of times & everytime he would see me he would just want to look at me & even cried 1 time [which he NEVER does]. He would call me everyday [mind you that in the first 2 months he was so mean to me, telling me he loved her, to get a boyfriend already, to get over it].

Alot of things happend. In February we even went to some concert together [which he insisted because he missed me, wanted me to be safe...etc] We had a talk that night & he told me that he was just so confused....

I wanted to move on--- I started going to the gym & have met some amazing people all this time. We dont talk anymore & I hear that his gf & him have problems...

Now I feel pretty good. Form feeling like I was going to die to great.

I have a new boyfriend at the moment whom I have great feelings for & hope it lasts. I finally feel like I could love again... I feel like me again. :)

Edith Piaf [the french singer] once was in an interview when she was asked what her advice would be to the women, young ladies & young girls...

Her answer. LOVE

I guess we should be happy that we have even felt that feeling & at such young ages.

Too late to break the string?

Fri, 03 Apr 2009 18:47:08 GMT

Am I still able to get the same reaction if I started no contact now? Or does it have a different effect if you were to do it since day 1?

ex boyfriend

Mon, 30 Mar 2009 17:03:05 GMT

dear ex boyfriend,

For the past 4 months I have thought nothing more than to be with you again. Every inch of my body wanted you back- I wanted YOU back. I know you are confused about life, me & her & I understand. So that is why I am leaving. Although I am most for certain sure you think I will always be there I am not- not anymore. I hope you understand that EVERY relashionship is different & that she will N E V E R be me. You say " Please be my friend, why can't we be friends, I need you there..." When you know deep in you heart we cannot.

A friend does not call you telling you they miss you, that they are yours, that you will always have a special place in you heart, doesn't want you to date anyone ["because everyones a lameass"], they don't hurt you by telling you hurtful things...

Maybe one day when you & I grow up things can be different so please explore your world- live life & be well.

You will always remain something precious inside of me.

him

Mon, 05 Jan 2009 22:19:26 GMT

So I fell asleep at 9:00 pm- I was so exausted from working out! I am awakened by my phone ringtone- I check who it is---Guess who. Him. I din't answer but then he called me again so I picked up. Here is what our convo consisted of:

me: hellooo??? [all tired]

him: hey---were you sleeping?

me: yeaaaa

him: oh sorry, I just wanted to say hi.

me: ohhhhhh hello.

him: so what were you doing?

me: [laugh] I am laying down.

him: I miss you.

me: [I do a small sigh giggle] so what are you doing?

him: listening to music

**our convo goes on for about another ten minutes. then--

him: well I'm going to go to sleep

me: yea me too

him: i'll call you some other time---maybe we can hang out too

me: okay @$#%%

him: [says something but couldn't hear him]

me: bye

him: bye

Does he really miss me? I think so but then again if he did he would'nt be with this other girl. Right?